Note to self.

Hopelessness. A yearning that’s never going to end.

Enough.

 

Playing with fonts…

It’s time to break free,

It’s time to hope again,

It’s time to remember that you will rise again,

It’s time to move on, time to forget,

It’s time to know that life’s not always a scary threat,

It’s time to rekindle friendships, it’s time to stop being cynical,

Your deep mistrust in everyone is almost comical,

Remember, each person is not alive just to tear you apart,

It’s time to perceive life with an open heart,

It would be nice if you stopped wasting time,

Use the days wisely, you are in your prime,

There’s only so much you can mope,

Wherefore is that lovely thing called hope?

Adversity? Why does it scare you so?

That’s how life is, don’t you know?

If you will, with Allah’s will, defeat it!

Don’t let it kill your very spirit,

Come on, my friend, you know it’s time to embrace life once more,

Don’t miss the opportunities knocking at your door!

What’s happened, has happened, and may well scar you forever,

But to let it stop you from everything — now that’s not exactly clever!

So you’re a fool sometimes, and you’ve messed up pretty bad,

Seriously, those are experiences everyone’s had!

So please be happy, and please remember to smile,

Learn to hope again, and not just for a little while!

When the dying flower spoke…

 

 

 

FAQ’s and a poem for Mom

Why am I not blogging anymore?

I’ve been too caught up with life. Both physically and emotionally too drained out to do more.

Is this blog dying?

No, but unfortunately it appears to be in a coma.

Have I stopped photography?

No but I’m too knackered to post the pics up here.

Why don’t I visit your blogs anymore?

Time. And I do. Honest. Just not as much as before.

Do I intend take up blogging seriously again?

Oh yes. Just don’t know when. I miss it immensely.

Do I value your likes, emails, comments, and visits?

Oh yeah!!!! Like anything. Thanks so much for all the love! It makes me smile.

Have I died?

Err, not yet. Thankfully.

So that just about wraps it up. And a little poem to Mom before I leave…

To Mom…

You left us too soon, and too suddenly,

Sometimes I wonder if you’re really still there,

You with your winning smile and lovely hair,

You with your gentle ways and unmatchable sincerity,

You with your culinary talents and all round dexterity,

You with a voice that could do away with a thousand fears,

You with a hug that could wipe away my tears,

You with your carefully thought out advice,

You with your loving chiding were eternally nice,

You with that special fragrance that was exclusively yours,

You with your chadar on casually as you did the chores,

You’re missed Mom, more than you know,

Your absence makes the fondness grow,

Your departure has left a void that can never be fulfilled,

There’s always something missing even when I’m thrilled,

And in times of pain and frustration and when nothing makes sense,

I long for your sensible words that would help me cleanse,

I search Mom, and I search but I can’t hold on to you,

A fleeting image of your sparkling smile that’s all I have of you.

If you know I’m writing this, I just want to say thank you very much,

And that I dearly miss your presence and your loving touch.

You went away too soon, I didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye,

All I have in remembrance of you is this tear from my eye.

Anta Waliyyi Fid Dunya Wal Aakhirah

So I’m not blogging a lot, and I’m not very active on the blogosphere. Lots happening. Sorry guys, life.

Beautiful ayah from Surah Yusuf

 

I look up at the sky in wonder,

And I search for You my Lord,

The night descends with a stupor that hurts my ears,

My sight is blurred with tears,

My head is swimming with a million confusions,

With strange thoughts and impossible decisions,

The shore of the stormy sea is far away,

I hope to see the dawn of a pleasant day,

Allah I realize how helpless I really am without You,

Unless You will it there’s nothing I can do,

Not a step I can take not an eyelid can I blink,

Surely if You do not help me my boat will sink!

Our enemies are strong, vicious and armed,

Yet if Only you protect me I cannot be harmed,

Oh Allah, please have mercy on all those in need of Your guiding light,

Please be that Noor I desperately need in a never-ending night.

 

 

The moments slip by

 

Photo and Text by me

 

Someone stop the hands of time,

They’ve tricked me time and again,

Time’s slipping by like a sailing ship,

Or like sand through my fingers, I can’t get a grip,

I know the time is near, it’s almost staring me in the eye,

To use it wisely I have to try,

Oh Allah, why did the moments of the blessed month pass away so soon,

It seems like only yesterday we saw the Ramadan moon,

I thought I’d fast and pray and get closer to You,

I thought I would find that which is pure and true,

But the month just went by and I couldn’t even hold on,

Allah, Oh Allah, it almost appears to be gone!

The blessed night remains concealed,

During which Your book was revealed,

I thought I’d find it and it would change everything,

Oh how much peace and blessings it would bring!

But Allah will I find it, or will I remain in darkness?

I implore You My Lord, praised be Your greatness!

Allow me to find it, guide me and hold my hand,

Make it easy for me to in worship stand,

My heart is sinking, my face is covered with shame,

Truly my Lord, I am the one to blame,

Oh Allah my ibadah is like a man without limbs and without senses,

So imperfect, pitiable, lacking – yet I seek Your good graces,

Perhaps next Ramadan I won’t be around to witness,

Please Allah answer my call of distress,

My deen and dunya are both precariously poised,

Around me there is strife and a surreal noise,

Make me steadfast and amongst those pardoned,

Save me from losing hope and feeling disheartened,

Please don’t judge me Allah, have mercy upon me,

In the gardens of Jannah please let me be.

Amen.

A poem for my ex.

(Note: I wrote this poem after my ex and I got together — but only for a day. Make sure you read it right till the end.)

 

A poem for my ex

You and I got back together,

But only for a day,

Before each one of us went our own separate way,

We had spent each waking moment in each other’s company,

I never slept without you by my side, some said it was funny,

Touching you with my hands I relived those moments,

Those golden days when I felt content even with your silence,

I liked your dark handsome looks,

You were nothing like those two-timing crooks,

You did everything you could and yet I had to let you go,

I’m sorry for the pain it caused – you didn’t even show,

You seemed to understand when I didn’t pick you,

Yet I know you were hurt when there was someone new,

You stood on the sidelines watching as someone took your place,

You handled those moments with unmatchable grace,

And yesterday when I needed you, you were happy to be with me again,

But I was frustrated even then – I cannot feign.

You’re just not that sexy, and neither are you as cool,

You’re not the kind that would make a girl drool,

Yes you can be counted upon and no doubt you are smart,

But the iPhone is smart too – and a perfect piece of art!

You my dear Nokia E71,

My time with you is over and done,

We shared some precious moments together,

And you may call me a friend of only fair-weather,

But the iPhone has a sublime touch-screen,

And the apps are some of the best I have ever seen,

So I bid you farewell until I need you again,

Having you around  for emergencies is a boon not a bane!

Ha ha – thumbs up if you thought I was talking about a guy in the beginning. Apologies to call a phone an ex but really we spend more time with our smartphones than we do with our significant others – don’t you agree?

Image via Wikipedia

Image via geek.com

The overwhelming mercy

Note: Don’t know if you know about the unbloggable rant? This little poem is all that’s left of it. How strange.

Text and photo by Mehmudah Rehman

 

Sometimes I feel like a pebble in the way,

Dismissed into the distance by many a wandering foot,

At times farther away and sometimes just a step or two,

With every boot the challenge is new,

Forgotten, lonely and devoid of all respect,

With every new pedestrian I know not what to expect,

I wonder to myself – how long will this endless path continue?

All there is, is merciless hate – that indeed is true,

The darkness around me so profound, nothing could pierce it,

I plod along knowing I will once more be hit,

And then I found I wasn’t alone,

Perhaps my tears mattered to the One I call my own,

When I thought the path couldn’t get more treacherous,

I suddenly found Someone who was unbelievably generous,

Enveloping me in His overwhelming mercy – no I wasn’t forsaken,

Despite my mistakes, and my shortcomings, here was toleration,

Strangely, a part of me knew all along that help wasn’t far away,

That Allah’s mercy envelopes even a pebble in the way.

My questions, forgotten, my accusations no longer mattered,

The biggest query of all had been so effectively answered.

There was love, and a place I could turn to without being judged,

And for that alone, I let go of all that I ever begrudged,

My heart, as light and free as the feathers of a bird,

Takes flight into the sky content that it’s been heard.