Smell the roses

 

Note: Wrote this a while back, somehow it just got ignored.

Sometimes I like constructing unusual sentences, and I try to use the finest words I can possibly find. At other times though, I feel the need to use the simplest of words to convey the strongest of messages. So here goes: Life is tough.

 

It’s an obvious thing, isn’t it? But I write it so because with every problem that comes my way, I worry as though the entire world is collapsing, as if life being tough is something out of the ordinary. I worry like a professional worrier – it’s almost as though someone were paying me for worrying by the hour. (The current state of my bank account reflects that worrying does not pay very well, sadly).

 

To begin my day, I worry we’ll all get late and no one will reach school, college or work on time. Then I fret because the younger one refuses to swallow a bite of her egg or wear the clothes I selected for her. Then we finally leave and as I sit in the car and drive myself to class, worry envelops me again. And this time it’s diverse worry – apparently I excel in all kinds!

 

I worry about the little disagreement he and I had in the morning, I worry if the kids are safe and having a good time. I worry about my incomplete assignment and I worry about the family abroad and about the friend whose husband passed away. And then when I get to class, I let the wisdom and knowledge imparted take me away just for a little while. For a few precious hours I try to ignore the million little things on my mind and just learn; absorb. Sometimes a phone call or a text puts me in the zone again and in any case, it’s whilst driving back that I think about problems most easily. Indeed, I have been known to burst into tears at the steering wheel and still manage to ferry everyone across safely.

 

I’ll spare you the tedious details of my worrying from hereon, because I suppose you get a fair idea that I worry a lot. I haven’t written this down for anything except serious chiding to my own self. Yes, everyone has issues. I do and I’m sure you do. In fact, if I ask you to name one thing that’s troubling you right now, you’d be hard pressed to name just one! But does that mean we constantly fret and are forever anxious?

 

It’s a given that things won’t always be pleasant. As everyday passes, we get older and sometimes we get sick and we get the odd white hair and someday we’ll have a full head of snow white hair, and people will hurt us, judge us in the worst way possible, loved ones will die and there Will. Be. Problems. So?

 

Is that something so unique or unwarranted? We constantly fear the future and bemoan the past. And the present slides by all too quickly. My children grow up in front of my eyes and I refuse to enjoy their childhood, their innocent little words, and their unconditional love, their sloppy kisses and their middle of the night hugs. All I worry about is that their room is a mess, that they’re not dressed right and of course, that they haven’t eaten their perfect balanced diet and that they’re not doing well enough at school.

 

I worry about assignments and I overlook the fact that I am doing something as important as learning? I crib about everything and forget to enjoy the company of the beautiful people God placed in my life? Why? I treat chores at home as though they were designed to exhaust – nay annihilate me, ignoring the fact I am making a difference in the lives of those that I care about?

 

Like I said, worrying doesn’t pay (well or otherwise) at all. I don’t know about you, but I seriously need to take a breather from the manic pace of life, just sit still, give thanks and smile from within, smell the forgotten roses and count my blessings.

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12 thoughts on “Smell the roses

  1. I think worrying sometimes comes with the territory of motherhood, but worry really serves no one. Yet we still do it. As for me, I am learning that there is really no control over anyone or anything so when I start to worry, I have to remember to say, “I don’t know anything about that.” That turns it over to a higher power. Be well and stay blessed, Mehmudah.

  2. You hit the nail on the head for me on this post. I like to remind myself that the only thing I have control over is how I react to things I don’t have control over. It helps curb my worrying.

  3. Mehmudah, the problem is in smelling the roses, instead you should smell coffee 🙂 And that too in the morning and not at night. You are late in getting up because you have not organized your life, you may think you have but you haven’t. Don’t let the work dominate you, instead you dominate the work by putting it in its place. The more work you leave behind the more powerful it becomes and starts playing with your mind. You need to shrug off laziness and lethargy. Most people do not admit they are lazy or lethargic. Some admit it shamelessly but do nothing about it. I hate it when this happens to me and suddenly I roll up my sleeves and deal with the unfinished business.

    The other thing that I have learned to deal with fear is by telling myself is, the worst thing is it may not happen according to my expectations like before writing an exam, before appearing for a job interview or before meeting your boss. Then I say so what? This is not the end of the world. I have tried my best, I have done my best if that doesn’t happen may be its God’s will and whatever happens is in my best interest. God has so far not harmed me or disappointed me so why should I worry from before?

    • I think you’re being a bit judgemental here.
      But indeed, we need to strengthen our trust in Allah, and whatever happens is part of a master plan that Allah alone knows. and He always does the best for us, that is true.

      • Iam sorry if you see it like that, I am not judgmental and when I say ‘you’ its not you but anyone and that coffee thing is just a joke, I don’t drink coffee or tea at breakfast. Only as a courtesy if someone insist.

        Btw, there seems to be no interest for you on legslip? There is something new and its for a cause, pls go thru it if you have time. Thanks

  4. I have grown a lot better with age, have learnt that life is too short to sweat the details. But I still revert to type on occasion….now I worry about the grandchildren 😀

  5. I suppose there’s no impeccable cure to such anxieties. These are part of life and we must fight them. But this article I read a few weeks back helped feeling a bit relieved.

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